


one more word and you won't survive

by softlass27



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Drama, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, Kidnapping, M/M, Minor Character Death, Recovery, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-29
Updated: 2020-07-29
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:42:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 19,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25599022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/softlass27/pseuds/softlass27
Summary: Robert can’t understand how he got here.One minute, he’d been dozing on the sofa at home, suffering the hangover from hell – or perhaps the beginnings of a bad stomach bug. Feeling sorry for himself and wishing he had Aaron there to make him a brew and play with his hair, probably whilst teasing him for not being able to handle his drink in his old age.The next, he’s slowly waking up on a hard floor, back to the corner and facing a dark and musty room that he doesn’t recognise.or,Canon divergence where Robert is the one who Lachlan kidnaps in 2018.
Relationships: Aaron Dingle/Robert Sugden
Comments: 34
Kudos: 112





	one more word and you won't survive

**Author's Note:**

> Ahaha, ok so. When I first started this fic for the Robron Engagement Gift Exchange, it was meant to be about 10,000 words max. As you can see, I got a bit carried away there.

** PART i. **

Robert can’t understand how he got here. 

One minute, he’d been dozing on the sofa at home, suffering the hangover from hell – or perhaps the beginnings of a bad stomach bug. Feeling sorry for himself and wishing he had Aaron there to make him a brew and play with his hair, probably whilst teasing him for not being able to handle his drink in his old age. 

The next, he’s slowly waking up on a hard floor, back to the corner and facing a dark and musty room that he doesn’t recognise. He’s still in the clothes he was wearing at home, though they’re now covered in a thick layer of dust, and he doesn’t have any shoes on.

As he tries to push himself up, a wave of nausea quickly overtakes his body, making him gag and collapse back on his side with a heavy thud. He still feels as terrible as he did the last time he was conscious, but he’s not sure if it’s the result of whatever he was suffering from earlier, or the growing sense of dread that’s travelling through his body.

“Finally awake, then?” 

Robert jumps when he hears a voice from somewhere in the room. He looks up and blinks rapidly, squinting until his blurry vision makes out the shadowy figure of… Lachlan? 

He’s stood in the corner opposite Robert, leaning against the wall and tossing a plastic bottle of water between his hands. What the hell is Lachlan doing here? What the hell is _he_ doing here?

“Wha… what’s goin’ on?” He says hoarsely, tongue feeling too thick in his mouth.

Lachlan’s mouth twists into an unnerving smile. 

“What’s going on? What's going _on_ is that I’m finally giving you what you deserve,” he says lightly, pushing away from the wall and coming towards him.

Robert finally manages to drag himself into a sitting position, bringing a shaky hand to his head as it throbs at the movement. It’s only then that he notices the chain wrapped tightly around his waist. He reaches down and tugs frantically but it won’t budge. Disbelieving eyes follow the short line of steel links that goes from his body to a rusty pipe running along the wall behind him.

“What the hell is this?” He twists to stare back at Lachlan, who simply stands and watches him with an amused look on his face.

“Lachlan! What is this? What the fuck do you think you’re _doing_?”

“Were you not listening before?” Lachlan admonishes. “I told you, this is payback. _And_ it’s me finally getting rid of you for good.”

“What – how – ”

Lachlan crouches down in front of him, just out of reach as he places the bottle on the floor.

“Been feeling pretty poorly since yesterday, have you?” 

Robert frowns when Lachlan raises his eyebrows at him knowingly.

“Nauseous, groggy, banging headache? Yeah, that’s called carbon monoxide poisoning, mate.”

“… What did you do?”

“I decided I’d had enough of you, wanted you to finally stop breathing. It wasn’t difficult, just took a little tampering with your boiler,” Lachlan says as he rises and begins to pace the room. 

“See, my initial plan was to finish you off there and then. All I’d have to do was sit back and wait, then just like that, you’re lying dead in your own home. A tragic accident, these sorts of things happen all the time. No one would be any the wiser.” 

He pauses and narrows his eyes at Robert. 

“But then I thought… no. Why should you get to just… _slip_ _away_ like that without paying for everything you’ve done? Simply falling asleep and not waking up… no no no, that would be too kind. Easier for me, sure, but it wouldn’t be justice, not really.”

Robert’s heart begins to pound so loudly in his chest, he wonders if Lachlan can hear it. 

_He wants to kill me. For real this time._

“Justice? What the hell are you talking about?”

Lachlan scoffs. 

“Of course you don’t get it, why would you? Why would the _great_ _Robert Sugden_ ever think that he’d done anything wrong?” He’s on the verge of shouting now, arms waving agitatedly. 

“All you’ve done – all you’ve _ever_ done – is screw things up for me. Over and over again you mess up my life, make me suffer. So now… ” He trails off, eyes filled with a kind of pure hatred Robert had only ever caught glimpses of over the years. It turns his stomach. 

“I’m going to make you suffer, too.”

Robert swallows thickly, staring up at him with wide eyes.

“That’s why I decided to go back to yours so I could bring you here. Make it last, you know?” Lachlan frowns suddenly, annoyance clouding his face. “Course, I didn’t plan on _Rebecca_ walking in when I was in the middle of moving you.”

“Rebecca?” Robert blinks, shaking his head in an attempt to clear it. “What d’you mean, where is she?”

“That’s not for you to know. She’s not here to help you, if that’s what you’re thinking.”

“You’ve… taken her, too?”

“I couldn’t have her interfering!” Lachlan snaps. “She was about to ruin everything by calling a bloody ambulance, so I had to take her as well. I’m keeping her somewhere else.”

“So you’ve got both of us locked up... separately? Lot of to-ing and fro-ing for you, isn’t it?” Robert says, braver than he feels.

“You think this is some sort of game?” Lachlan scowls at him.

“I’m not scared of you, Lachlan.”

Lachlan blinks slowly, before grinning.

“You should be.”

He walks outside without a backward glance, closing the door firmly behind him. Robert can hear the sound of a heavy lock being bolted into place. Then silence.

****

As far as Robert can tell, he's in some kind of disused outbuilding. At first he'd thought it must be part of an old farm. But the sound of rustling trees outside is loud... the area must be forest, not fields, so that couldn't be right. Perhaps a long-abandoned hunting lodge? Wherever it is, it's pretty damn secluded.

The room is completely bare. Dusty wooden floorboards and thick walls, with small, high windows that don’t allow much light into the room. The only door is on the other side of the room, a few feet away, a foul-looking toilet is on the right, and an empty stone fireplace sits to his left.

Other than that, there’s nothing. Nothing useful, anyway.

****

As darkness begins to fall, the nausea that had kept Robert slumped on the floor begins to fade a little. Enough for him to finally manage to stand, gripping the wall for support. He staggers towards the door, only to be stopped short after just a few steps, the snap of the chain digging painfully into his torso.

He can’t reach. He’s trapped.

_Where’s Aaron?_ He thinks desperately. _Is he home yet?_

Robert wracks his brain and tries to remember when Aaron said he was coming back from Malta, whether his chicken pox was clearing up, but his mind’s too foggy. He wonders if Liv’s called Aaron, told him that Robert had gone somewhere and not come back. Maybe Diane's rung him, too, told him that she was only supposed to be looking after Seb for a few hours, not days.

_Does he know I’m in trouble? Does anyone?_

****

“Someone will come looking for me,” Robert tells Lachlan when he turns up the next morning, projecting as much confidence as he can muster. “You think Aaron just won’t notice that I’ve disappeared? He’s probably already called the police by now, they’ll find me.” 

_Aaron will find me._

Lachlan stares at him for a moment, before rolling his eyes and pulling a phone out of his pocket. Robert’s heart sinks when he realises it’s _his_ phone. _Shit._

“You think I haven’t thought of that? Think I’m that stupid?”

“I… ”

“I’ve made your excuses to your boyfriend, Rebecca’s too. It’s not enough to keep everyone fooled forever, no, but it’s enough to buy me the time I need. Right, if you’ll excuse me, Belle and I are meant to be having breakfast with Sam and Lydia.”

****

He must have spent hours pulling on the chain. And the pipe. He kicks at it over and over again, pulls and heaves with all his might, grunting as he yanks harder and harder. His hands and sock-clad feet are killing him.

He tries yelling until his ears ring. He can’t reach any of the windows, but he shouts in their direction, screams for help, for someone to hear him. Slaps his palms against the thick wall in frustration when the only thing he hears in return is the quiet rustle of trees.

No one comes.

****

It’s on the fourth day that he starts hearing Aaron’s voice. He wonders if that has something to do with the fact that he finished off the water bottle Lachlan left over 24 hours ago. The familiar gruffness of it fills his ears as he dozes against the wall, and while he knows it isn’t real, it’s still comforting.

_You need to get the hell out of here, Robert._

“Yeah, no shit,” Robert says a little hysterically into the empty room.

****

Robert comes to with a start when Lachlan slams the door loudly. 

“Morning, sunshine,” Lachlan calls, rustling around in a carrier bag he’s brought with him.

Robert shuffles up onto his knees to face him. His mouth is so dry, he can barely swallow. Lachlan twists the cap off another bottle of water and holds it in front of Robert’s face.

“Here.” 

Robert stares at him and doesn’t take it. He’s so thirsty, thirstier than he’s ever been, but…

“It’s not poison or anything, I told you I’m not letting you off that easy.” Lachlan rolls his eyes at him. “Now drink.”

He presses the the bottle insistently to Robert’s lips until he’s opening his mouth and drinking greedily, gulping down as much as he can before the bottle is snatched away again. He reaches out for it desperately, face flushing with embarrassment when Lachlan sniggers at him.

“Thought so.” 

He turns and begins to pull a few snacks out of the carrier bag, placing them within Robert’s reach. It doesn’t make sense.

“Come on, then,” Robert tries. "What's the great plan, Lucky?”

“ _Don't_ call me that,” Lachlan snaps instantly.

“Why are you even bothering to keep me alive? Why not just kill me?”

Lachlan raises an eyebrow, before pursing his lips.

“I will, eventually. But every day you’re still here... ” he says slowly. “Is another day for you to think about what you’ve done. It’s another day for you miss your stupid boyfriend and your son and the rest of your annoying family. It’s another day for you to know that you’ll never see them again. It’s another day for you to remember _every single_ decision you’ve made that’s lead to you sitting here like this. This is part of your punishment, Robert.”

_Don’t react, don’t give him the satisfaction,_ Aaron’s voice tells him urgently. _He’s just trying to mess with your head._

He’s doing a pretty good job of it.

****

He’s taken to playing with the ring on his left hand, twisting and turning it absently as he stares down at his lap. He doesn’t usually, that was always more Aaron’s habit than his – he’d started fiddling with it from the first day it was on his finger.

It used to drive Robert slightly mad, but now… stroking his thumb over the warm band brings him more comfort than he cares to admit.

****

They’ve settled into a disturbing routine. Lachlan comes by a couple of times a week, only staying long enough to throw down a few morsels of food and a new plastic bottle of water, taunt Robert for a few minutes, then he’s gone again.

Robert thinks absently about attacking Lachlan if he ever gets close enough to grab. But what would that achieve? Hitting him or knocking him out wouldn't get him out of here ; he’d still be trapped, chained up until he eventually starved to death. As much as it pains him to admit it, Lachlan is the only thing keeping him alive right now.

_Don't lose it, you need to be clever about this._

In a way, the days where Lachlan doesn’t come are the worst ones. Hour after hour drags by endlessly, the summer heat making the room unbearably stuffy. Robert wishes the chain would at least allow him to open a damn window, he’d give anything for five minutes of fresh air. 

Lachlan was right about one thing; this time does give Robert a chance to think. His mind replays every time he wound Lachlan up over the years – every dig at him, every jab. Every time he rubbed his power over Chrissie or Lawrence in Lachlan’s face, just for the fun of it. Not to mention every time he thought there might be something seriously wrong in Lachlan’s head, that he might be a real danger to someone… and did nothing about it. He always just let it go, too preoccupied with whatever scheme he was carrying out at the time.

He’s certainly paying the price for that now.

****

Whatever supplies Lachlan leaves aren't enough to keep Robert going for long, even when he tries to ration them. His stomach feels hollow, clenching and aching with an unbearable hunger that increases with each passing day.

When he has the strength – usually after finishing off a portion of whatever scraps he has – Robert slowly paces as far around the room as the chain will allow, mind turning helplessly as he tries to think of something – anything – that will get him out of this.

_I don’t think you have long left, Robert._

****

Rebecca’s gone. Dead.

Lachlan comes storming in angrily one evening, brandishing a familiar-looking summer kimono. It’s yellow with a floral print… Robert thinks it’s the one Rebecca was wearing when she'd left Seb with him, the last time he'd seen her.  The last time he’d been at home.

It’s drenched in blood.

“Stupid bitch,” Lachlan spits as he throws it to the floor with a wet slap. His hands are covered in blood, too, deep red stains going all the way up his forearms.

Oh, God.

“What did you do?” Robert asks, unable to stop his voice from shaking. “Lachlan, what did you _do_?”

“She tried to trick me. Tried to make me think she was gonna help me, that she’d just take Seb and leave, let me get on with my life. But she was a liar, she was gonna betray me, turn me in, her own _family_. She tried to run, I had to stop her from getting away.”

Lachlan stares vacantly at his own hands for a moment, before picking up the kimono and shoving it in Robert’s face.

“You see what happens, Robert?” His voice cracks, eyes darting wildly. “See what happens to people who try to get one over on me?”

Robert watches in petrified silence as Lachlan pulls a folded-up newspaper from inside his jacket and goes to the fireplace, ripping it to shreds until he’s made a small pile in the stone hearth. He pulls out a lighter out of his pocket and set the kimono alight, throwing it down in among the newspaper.

“I didn’t want to do it, I didn’t enjoy it. I didn’t enjoy the others, either,” Lachlan murmurs as the flames quickly catch and spread in the hearth. “I’ll enjoy it when it’s you, though.”

Robert watches the smoke curl up into stale air for long minutes, and tries very hard not to panic.

“What others?”

Lachlan shakes his head, almost trancelike as he keeps watching the fire.

“Lachlan, what others?”

“Mum, she was… she was making us leave, taking me away from Belle. Because of you and your stupid kid. Your fault, as usual.”

Chrissie… no. Please no. 

Robert’s trembling hands lock together, fingers on his right hand rubbing back and forth over the ring on his left as he tries to calm himself.

“She only cared about herself… she never loved me, not really. Her making me leave Belle just proved that. So I stopped her. I made her stop the car.”

“You made her _crash_ the car… ” He feels so sick, he has to chew the inside of his cheek to stop himself from gagging in horror. 

He’d been right; he _knew_ there was something wrong with Lachlan after the crash, that he’d been acting strange. He never should have let it drop, let everyone talk him out of his suspicions. 

“Had no choice.”

“She – she was your mum, Lawrence was your grandfather, they loved you… ” 

“No,” Lachlan says shortly.

Robert remembers the fearful look on Chrissie’s face in the mangled car, just moments before she’d died. How scared she’d been, the pain and sorrow on her eyes. At the time, before his suspicions towards Lachlan had really set in, he’d assumed it was due to the terror and shock of being in such a horrendous accident.

Now he has confirmation that it was more than that. It was the look of someone who’d been hurt by the person they loved most in the world. By their own son.

As he squeezes his eyes shut against the spike of tears, Lachlan presses on.

“Then Gerry. I didn’t want to, but he knew too much. He kept saying things.”

_Keep him talking, you might be able to use this,_ Aaron’s voice insists in his ear.

"You... you killed Gerry?"

No answer.

“The B&B roof… you did that, you caused it?”

“I had no choice.”

“Why?” 

“He could’ve told people, he could’ve told Belle. I couldn’t risk it, I can’t let anything stand in the way of my future with her.”

Robert can’t help the incredulous laugh that splutters out of his mouth. “Belle's not stupid, you really think she'll want anything to do with you when she finds out you're the next _Yorkshire bloody Ripper_?”

Lachlan’s eyes darken, and his head twists slowly to look at Robert. 

_Not what I meant, idiot._ Aaron sounds annoyed and Robert can’t blame him. He should’ve kept his damn mouth shut.

Lachlan stares at him for a long moment, and his eyes fall down to Robert’s hands. Robert can see the moment Lachlan clocks the way he’s holding tightly onto his ring.

Then he’s storming over and lunging at Robert with his arms outstretched.

“I’ll take that,” he grunts as he grabs for Robert’s left hand, fingers scrabbling for the ring. Weak as he is, Robert fights him as best he can, kicking and pushing back out of his reach. But he hasn’t eaten in two days; the teenager has the advantage and he manages to pin Robert’s left arm to the floor before stamping on his wrist. _Hard._

Robert’s screaming before he can stop himself, white hot pain shooting through his arm and bile rising in his throat as he feels bone snap. He’s still gasping in agony when Lachlan leans down and rips the ring off his now-limp hand.

“Not like you’re going to be needing it anymore, is it? Might as well destroy it with the rest of the evidence,” he says and holds it over the fireplace.

“Lachlan, no, _please_ – ” From the first day this nightmare started, he’d sworn to himself that he wouldn’t beg, but he does now. His ring is all he has to hold onto, the only reminder he has that someone out there is missing him, someone must be trying to bring him home.

Lachlan’s hand hovers over the hearth for a moment, before he smirks and retracts his arm.

“Nah, not sure it’s hot enough to melt actually,” he says and slips the ring into his pocket. “I’ll just have to find some other way to get rid of it.”

Then he’s gone, and it’s just Robert and the slowly-dying flames.

****

“Can’t believe we didn’t get married for real… ” Robert mumbles to an empty room, gaze fixated on his now-bare ring finger. “Really should’ve gotten that paperwork sorted.”

_Always busy, aren’t we?_

“Not right now, I’m not.”

_We’ll just have to do it when you come back, eh?_

He sobs himself to sleep that night.

****

The chain isn’t so tight around him anymore. The longer he goes without proper food, the more it slips down to rest on his hips.

He’s careful to hide this from Lachlan whenever he appears. He sits as still as he can, hoisting his jeans and the chain up, puffing his stomach out to look larger than it is. Lachlan doesn’t notice a thing.

_Not such a clever clogs after all, is he?_

The chain isn’t loose enough to slip out of, not yet, but he keeps trying.

****

He keeps losing time.

He’d tried to keep track, tried to remember how many times the sun has risen and fallen since he’d been here.

But now things are becoming a hazy blur; he’s struggling to recall the number of days he’s already counted. He knows it’s been weeks, but how many? Has it been a month now? Two?

As each hot day give way to chilly night, Robert curls up on the floorboards and tries to imagine he’s somewhere else. He tries to imagine he’s at home in bed, tries to imagine the feeling of Aaron pressed behind him, a strong arm wrapped around his increasingly skinny waist.

“I miss you,” he whispers, shivering in the darkness.

_I miss you too, Rob._

****

“Saw Seb today,” Lachlan says conversationally as he tosses a stale-looking piece of bread in Robert’s direction. 

He speaks as casually as if he and Robert had bumped into each other in the cafe or on Main Street. As if he didn’t have Robert _locked up in the middle of fucking nowhere_.

“Poor kid, nearly all alone in the world. About to become an orphan before he’s even a year old,” he tuts, voice dripping with mock-sympathy.

Robert stares at him and tries to keep his breathing steady, even as the stab of fear for his son nearly causes the room to spin. Or perhaps that’s the hunger, he isn’t sure.

“He isn’t alone. He has my family. He has Aaron.”

“And you really think he would keep your kid around?” Lachlan’s mouth twists into a smirk. “Even after you’re gone for good?”

“Yeah, yeah I do. He loves Seb.”

“Seb’s nothing to Aaron, he’s just what he had to put up with when he took you back, he’s got enough going on with that sister of his. Seb’s not his _family_ , and you know how those Dingles feel about family, about blood… ”

Robert swallows thickly and tries to shrug the words off, even as the darkest, most insecure part of him can’t help acknowledging the truth in that statement.

_That’s a load of rubbish and you know it._ Aaron’s back again, voice firm and reassuring. _I love that little boy like my own. You_ know _I do, Robert._

“You’re wrong, Aaron’s not like that, he’d never leave Seb or _any_ child alone,” he insists, shaking his head. “Because he’s kind and – and caring. He’s _good._ Things you’d know nothing about.”

He’s pissed Lachlan off, he can tell. He breathes heavily through his nose for a moment, before lurching forwards to grab Robert by the hair and slam his head against the wall. Pain explodes in the back of his skull, and he bites his lip hard to keep from crying out.

“Doesn’t matter anyway, does it?” Lachlan hisses into his face, spit flying from his mouth. “Because even if your boyfriend _did_ want Seb, he can’t have him. He’s just the bloke you were seeing, he has no legal rights to the kid. But I do. Me… I’m his cousin, all he has in the world… ”

Robert’s blood runs cold. _No, he can’t be serious._

“No, even if Aaron… My family, Victoria would never – ”

“Oh, I think I can rustle up enough cash to get myself a good lawyer. That along with my family name… I think it should be enough to swing things in my favour, don’t you?”

Robert remains silent, too horrified to say anything further.

Lachlan chuckles at the distressed look on his face and takes a step back.

“Calm down, that’s not actually going to happen. You think I wanna be saddled with your brat? Let him get in the way of my plans? No chance.” He shrugs on his jacket and checks his phone briefly, before heading for the door

“If I do decide to take him, I can always stick him into care, far away from this dump of a village. Maybe he’ll get a new family, or who knows, maybe he’ll just get lost in the system, slip through the cracks. Maybe… ”

The door swings open with a creak, and he pauses to look back at Robert. He’s grinning widely, all teeth. 

“ _Maybe_ he’ll end up getting abused like your pathetic boyfriend was, grow up to be just another twisted thug – ”

Robert’s moving faster than he has in weeks, lurching to his feet and reaching for Lachlan with a snarl, fighting against the chain with every fibre of his being.

“I’ll fucking _kill_ you, you piece of – ”

Lachlan’s gone, door slamming and lock bolted. The sounds of his retreating footsteps are drowned out by Robert’s screams of rage.

****

The smell really is getting a bit much now. There’s no air in the room and the toilet flush barely works half the time. Robert’s never felt so disgusting, grimacing every time he runs a hand through his greasy hair or gets a whiff of his own clothes. The itch of the patchy stubble on his jaw is driving him mad. At least there isn’t a mirror in this place; he’s not sure he’d recognise himself.

_Look at the state of you._ Aaron’s voice is tinged with fondness.

“Still fancy me?”

_Always._

****

He dreams that he’s running towards the Mill. It must be late because the empty village is shrouded in darkness, but as he dashes down the drive, he can see a light on inside. Aaron must be in there, he has to be.

He launches himself at the front door, but it won’t budge. Ringing the bell and slamming the knocker into the wood over and over again doesn’t work, either. No one comes.

He abandons the door in favour of shuffling along the wall towards the kitchen window, the one that he saw the light coming from. As he peers inside, he can see Aaron standing inside with his back to him, his broad shoulders and dark curly hair instantly familiar.

“Aaron?” he calls as he tries knocking again. “Aaron!”

No response. Aaron doesn’t turn around, he doesn’t even move. Robert bangs on the window harder, palms smacking against the glass until they begin to throb.

“Aaron, I’m here, I’ve come home! _Aaron!_ ”

“You can’t go home, Robert,” comes a horribly familiar voice from behind him.

He twists to look over his shoulder, feeling sick when he sees Lachlan standing behind him with one hand on his hip, the other holding a long chain. 

“You’ve been gone too long, he’s forgotten you.”

“No… ” Robert turns back to face the kitchen where Aaron still remains motionless. “No, he hasn’t, he _wouldn’t_.”

“You’re coming with me now.” He hears the rattle of chains behind him as Lachlan steps closer. Aaron’s walking away now, moving out of sight.

“No, Aaron please, help me! I’m outside! _Aaron!_ ”

Robert jerks awake on the floor, Aaron’s name dying on his lips.

****

He’d give anything to hold Seb again. Even if it’s just once.

****

There’s a change in Lachlan the next time he appears. Instead of sauntering into the room with his usual air of arrogance, he bursts through the door so fast its hinges rattle. Every inch of him screams panic and worry as he slams it shut behind him, panting heavily and fumbling with a backpack.

Robert watches him, pushing himself up to sit against the wall and licking his cracked lips nervously.

“What’s wrong?”

Maybe he’s finally getting scared, maybe it’s all finally getting too much for him. Maybe Robert can use this.

“They’ve found – she – I couldn’t stop – ”

Lachlan’s not making much sense, fingers gripping his disheveled hair tightly as he darts to the fireplace. He pulls some cleaning supplies out of the backpack and starts scrubbing frantically where the ashy remains of Rebecca’s kimono still lie.

“You can’t keep this up, Lachlan,” Robert tries, schooling his voice into something low and soothing, rather than full of the overwhelming desperation he feels.

“Shut up.”

“Look, if you let me go, I’ll try to help you. I’ll tell the police you’ve had a rough time, that you’re not well. Come on, just listen to – ”

“ _I said shut up!_ ” Lachlan whirls around to face him with outraged eyes. “You think I’m listening to a word you say after Rebecca tried the same thing? You think I’m that stupid? _Do you?_ ”

He backhands Robert across the face with a furious scream, sending him sprawling onto the floor.

“That’s the last time you lie to me, Robert Sugden.” 

Robert scrambles back as Lachlan advances towards him with his fists clenched.

No, please, this can’t be it, not yet, not now.

The shrill chirp of a ringtone cuts off Robert’s panicked thoughts and stops Lachlan in his tracks. Standing over Robert’s curled up form, he pulls his phone out of his pocket and stares down at the screen, before huffing with frustration.

Robert stares up at him, hardly daring to move.

Lachlan looks back and forth between him and the phone for a moment, before he starts tapping at the screen.

“Belle… I need to see her… I need time to… ” He mutters, half to Robert, half to himself.

He picks up his backpack.

“But I’ll be back later and then… ” He looks at Robert with cold eyes. “I’m finally going to kill you, Robert. And I’m gonna love every second of it.”

****

“Come on, come on… ” 

Robert writhes on the floor, twisting and turning as he tugs at the chain with every ounce of strength he has left.

He’s been at this for ages now, ever since Lachlan left. His hips are in agony where the steel digs into his skin, but he doesn’t stop. He manages to squeeze the loop down another few centimetres before stopping to catch his breath, panting heavily against the floorboards. The shift of broken bones in his swollen left arm makes him want to vomit.

_You can’t stop, Robert._ Aaron’s voice says insistently in his ear. _You don’t have time to stop._

“Hurts… m’tired.”

_I know, I know you are, but you need to get out of here now, you need to come home now. Just keep trying, eh?_

“Can’t… ”

_You’ll make me think I fell for a quitter._

“S’my line.”

No reply.

“Okay, okay… ”

Robert leans over and begins to shimmy off his now too-big jeans, sliding them down his legs and tugging them off. He takes a breath and begins to pull and push once more, back arching with the effort.

“Come on, please, God, please, _please_ … ” Tears of frustration fill his eyes as he keeps going – even as every inch of his body is screaming at him to stop, to lie still and rest.

And suddenly, there’s some give, a pop, and just like that… the chain has slipped over the widest part of his body. Robert freezes and stares for a moment, before letting out a slightly giddy laugh and quickly shoving it down the rest of the way, kicking it off his legs frantically. 

_You did it, Rob, I told you you could._

He grabs his jeans, shoving his legs back into them and pushing himself to his feet, clinging to the waistband where it sags and making for the door. It’s locked, he knows it’s locked, but he can’t resist tugging on the handle desperately. He tries shoving it with his shoulder but it’s no use. Even if he had his full strength… there’s no budging that bolt. 

He’s still trapped. 

But he’s free to move and he has the element of surprise. It’s not much, but it’s something.

Soon enough, the door will be open again. And he’ll have to be ready when it does.

****

As the hours crawl by and night eventually falls, Robert stays by the window nearest the door, peeking out every now and then for any signs of life amongst the trees. 

Finally, he hears the sounds of rapid footsteps crunching through the forest floor.

It’s time.

He stands next to the door, back to the wall, and holds his breath. There’s a pause, a slide of the lock and the door is swinging open with an ominous creak. Lachlan strides right past him into the darkness of the room, only to stop in his tracks when he sees the empty chain lying on the floor.

Robert doesn’t give him any more time to react; he throws himself at Lachlan and punches him in the stomach as hard as he can, before throwing another into his nose. He feels a satisfying crack underneath his knuckles, and Lachlan cries out in pain and fury, hands coming up to clutch his face. 

Robert takes the precious few seconds this gives him to dart outside, but before he can get very far Lachlan comes up behind him, grabbing at the back of his t-shirt with a furious yell. They tussle viciously for a moment, until Robert manages to get Lachlan by the hair and slam his head against the wall. Lachlan stumbles for a moment, before crumpling to the ground. 

Now’s his chance.

Robert’s off in a flash, fleeing the building and moving through the trees as fast as he can, the sweet smell of fresh air filling his lungs and giving him renewed energy. He knows that won’t last; he’s running sheer adrenaline and the last fumes of his strength… they can only carry him so far. He has to make these next few minutes count.

_Should’ve shoved him inside the shack and locked it, really._ Aaron’s voice ponders. _You don’t know how long he’ll stay down, Rob._

His heart sinks and he curses his hunger-addled brain. Why didn’t he think of that? How could he be so _stupid_? He pauses for a moment, dithering over whether he should go back. Lachlan may not have come around yet, he might have time.

No, forwards only. Keep going forwards.

_Just keep swimming._

He huffs a tiny laugh and closes his eyes, body swaying as his mind flashes to the day he’d forced Aaron to watch that film with him and Seb. Only a couple of weeks before Lachlan tore him away from everything he loved. 

If he makes it out of this, he’ll let Aaron choose every film they watch for the rest of their lives.

_I’ll hold you to that._

The night sky makes it near-impossible to see where he’s going. Sharp stones and prickly pine needles stab painfully at his bare feet as he stumbles across the rough terrain, tripping over stray branches and scraping his hands and knees. If he can just get to a road, then – 

“Robert!”

His blood runs cold at the sound of Lachlan’s voice and quick footsteps coming up behind him. Veering to the right, Robert sinks down behind a wide tree trunk and slaps a hand over his mouth to muffle the sound of his heavy breathing.

Silence. He doesn’t dare move from his crouched position, not even to peer through the forest to see where he is.

“I know you’re here,” Lachlan suddenly calls in a singsong voice, his voice far too close for comfort. “You can’t hide from me, Robert. Just come out and I promise I’ll make it quick. It’ll all be over soon.”

_Not bloody likely, mate._

After a few long moments, Lachlan starts walking again. Robert can hear the sound of his footsteps moving further away until they’re barely there at all.

_Move, Robert. Now._

He inhales a few deep breaths before taking off again, running as fast as his shaky legs will carry him. If he keeps going in the opposite direction to Lachlan then –

_SLAM._

All the wind is knocked out of him as another body tackles his to the ground and Lachlan is suddenly on top of him, pinning Robert’s legs down with his own.

“Did you really think,” he pants, eyes blazing. “I was just gonna let you run away from me? _Did you?_ ”

Warm blood from Lachlan’s nose drips down onto Robert’s face as he wraps both hands around his throat, fingers curling until they’re digging painfully into his skin.

“It was always gonna come down to something like this, wasn’t it? You and me.”

He laughs mirthlessly as Robert chokes and wheezes, lungs screaming for air as his hands try to pull Lachlan’s away before moving to his chest, pushing and shoving at him frantically. As the hands gripping his neck squeeze even tighter, his vision turns spotty and his already-limited strength begins to fade.

Through the haze, he’s vaguely aware of Lachlan leaning down to hiss gleefully in his ear.

“Time for you to die, Robert.”

As Robert’s eyes flutter and his arms flop down to his sides, the sadistic face above him begins to melt away and is replaced with more welcome ones. Aaron’s. Seb’s. Victoria’s. 

_If this is how it ends, it doesn’t seem so bad,_ he thinks.

And then another thought cuts to the forefront of his mind.

_No._

The thing is, this isn’t the first time Robert has found himself backed into a corner. 

He’s fucked up more times than he can count – lost everything more than once, made every mistake it’s possible to make and always come back stronger. He’s survived furious beatings, bullet wounds to the chest, crashed cars filling up with dirty water, and lived to tell the tale. Every single time he’s been knocked down, he’s gotten back up again.

He’s Robert fucking Sugden, and he is not going to die at the hands of some twisted teenager.

He’s going to fight.

Previously-limp arms jerk to life, his palms flying across the ground in search of something – _anything_ – he can find. His right hand brushes against something rough and hard, and he reaches for it desperately, fingers scrabbling for purchase. 

Lachlan looks startled at the sudden surge of movement, but before he has the chance to regain control, Robert gets a grip on the object and swings up with all his might. The rock in his hand smashes into the side of Lachlan’s skull with a loud _thunk_. Lachlan sways above him, and Robert hits him again, and _again_ , until the hands on his neck finally loosen. 

As Robert coughs and splutters violently, gasping for oxygen, he watches through watery eyes as Lachlan keels to one side. His eyes roll back in his head before he slumps face-down in the dirt, shiny blood already pouring from his head.

Robert staggers to his feet, the rock slipping out of his hand as he stares down at Lachlan’s unmoving body. He doesn’t know if he’s dead or just knocked out, and frankly he doesn’t give a shit. All he wants to know is how to get the hell out of here.

He starts moving again, focusing all his remaining energy on putting one foot in front of the other, barely taking notice of any branches snagging his clothes or skin.

Another patch of uneven ground causes him to trip and fall to his hands and knees with a grunt, soft earth cool beneath his palms. The forest floor swims beneath him… all he wants to do is lie down on it. He’s so tired of fighting.

_Robert._

He sighs and shakes his head.

“I know,” he mouths and pushes himself back up, props himself against a tree trunk and takes a moment to close his eyes. “Keep going.”

_Robert!_

“I’m up, I’m up, fuck’s sake… ”

“Robert!”

His eyes fly open. That… didn’t sound like it was in his head. It almost – almost sounded like he was actually there that time.

“Robert! Are you here?”

That’s Aaron’s voice, his _real_ voice. He can hear him shouting – _bellowing_ , really – and there’s a kind of echo to it. As if he’s cupping his hands around his mouth, perhaps, trying to project his call to make himself heard. It’s coming from up ahead, Robert’s sure of it. 

And there’s… something else. Footsteps, the sound of a body – two bodies? – pushing through the trees.

“Robert! Come on, I know you’re out here somewhere!”

More footsteps. Somewhere in the distance, Robert can make out a couple of faint beams of lights. Torches?

“Cain, anything?” His voice sounds raw and cracked, full of urgency.

“Nothing, no sign. Let’s try going left.”

“Aaron… ” He tries, coughs when his damaged throat won’t let him do more than whisper hoarsely. “Aaron, I’m here…”

The footsteps are retreating now, the sound becoming fainter. 

No, please no. Please come back, _please_.

Robert pushes himself away from the tree and swallows hard, clears his throat as best he can.

“AARON!”

It tears out of his chest, his throat on fire as he screams the only name he can remember at this point.

The footsteps stop instantly. For a moment, there’s only silence, and then – 

“ROBERT?!”

The footsteps return, faster and heavier this time.

“Get off me, Cain, I heard him! _Robert?_ Rob, where are you?!”

Robert stumbles towards the sound, hot tears suddenly wetting his cheeks as he bounces from tree to tree, fingers clutching at rough bark. He’s pushing and pulling himself along more than walking now.

“Aaron? Aaron, I’m here!” He cries back, voice trembling.

“I’m coming, Robert, I’m coming for you. Just hang on, I’m coming!”

The footsteps speed up even more, until Robert can hear the loud snap of twigs and panting breaths. Three shaky steps later, and he sees him come into view.

Robert’s half-blinded by the light from the torch in Aaron’s hand, but he’d recognise that figure anywhere. It’s the greatest sight of his entire life.

“Aaron… ” It comes out as barely more than a whisper, his voice gone again. But it’s enough, Aaron hears him. Finally sees him.

“Rob… ”

And Aaron’s dropping the torch and sprinting towards him; Robert limps to meet him with arms outstretched, and it feels like slow-motion. He loses his footing on the last step but Aaron’s there to catch him, slamming into him and wrapping him up so tightly it takes Robert’s breath away.

“Oh my God, _Robert_ ,” Aaron’s crying and they’re sinking to the ground, Aaron's hands roaming all over Robert's body, touching him with desperate hands.

Robert buries his face in Aaron’s chest and sags into him with his entire body. Part of him is reluctant to cover Aaron with the grime he knows is all over him, dirt and sweat and blood caked everywhere, but he’s so beyond caring now.

Aaron’s shouting something to someone – Robert’s guessing Cain – but he’s too out of it to make out the words.

“Y’found me… ” he sighs, taking in the smell of sweat and aftershave and something that’s uniquely _Aaron_. He can’t believe he’d almost forgotten how good he smelled, how amazing his touch felt.

“Course I did,” Aaron whispers, shuddering breaths hitting Robert’s cheek. He fists a hand in Robert’s filthy hair and tucks him under his chin as if he’s the smaller of the two. “I’ve got you now, it’s okay, you’re okay.”

Robert’s fingers clench in Aaron’s jacket. “Lachlan… back there, I hit him – ”

“Shh, help’s coming, alright? Cain’s sorting it. You’re safe with me, I promise.”

Perhaps it’s hearing this – the confirmation that he’s safe, that it’s _over_ – that causes Robert’s eyes to fall closed.

“Robert?” Aaron’s voice loses its softness, sounding sharp all of a sudden. “Rob, you with me?”

Robert hums softly, even as his breathing slows and his grip on Aaron loosens, hands sliding down to his lap. Aaron shakes his shoulder, clutches his face.

“Robert, hey, open your eyes. Come on, I need you to stay with me, okay? _Robert?_ ”

His voice sounds further away now. Robert wants to reply, reassure Aaron that he’s not going anywhere, not ever again, but he can’t get his mouth to work anymore. 

The last things he hears are the sounds of Aaron’s cries and the sirens in the distance.

* * *

** PART ii **

He comes to with a violent start.

There are bright lights above him, harsh and blinding. Where the hell is he now? And more importantly, where’s Lachlan?

He tries to sit up frantically, only to have hands push him back down and unknown voices repeatedly saying his name. They don’t sound threatening, but he can’t be sure. 

He thrashes in their grip, and the voices become louder, more urgent. He thinks he hears a familiar one in among them – _Aaron_ – but before he can call out to him, everything goes dark again.

****

The next time Robert wakes up, everything is much slower.

As he becomes more aware of his surroundings, his senses kick into gear one by one. The smell of sterile air… the sound of rhythmic beeping somewhere to his left… the feeling of rough fingertips gently skating up and down his right arm.

It takes a few attempts, but he eventually opens heavy eyelids to look up at a white ceiling. His gaze drifts down to take in a small hospital room, a variety of machines with tubes and wires attached to him, and Aaron sat by his bedside, staring into space as he absently strokes Robert’s arm.

Robert tries to take his hand, but only manages to twitch a couple of fingers. It's enough to get Aaron’s attention, though, his head whipping up to stare at Robert with wide eyes.

“Hiya… ” he whispers.

“Hey,” Robert mouths back, licking his dry lips.

Aaron scrambles up pour him a drink and bring a straw to his mouth. The cool water is heavenly on his throat.

“Easy, just sips.”

As Aaron put the glass to one side and sits back down, Robert suddenly notices how clean he feels. His pale skin is free of dirt, and when he brings a weak hand up to his hair, it feels soft and fluffy instead of greasy and matted.

“Nice to… not feel like a tramp anymore,” he croaks, quirking a half-smile.

“I bet,” Aaron smiles back softly, fingers resuming their stroking down Robert’s arm. “I offered to give you a sponge bath myself, but the nurses insisted.”

“Shame… ”

Aaron huffs a laugh. He looks knackered; dark circles under his eyes and his curly hair wild and messy. He’s as beautiful as ever.

“How’re you feeling?” Aaron asks, face sobering.

Honestly, he can’t feel much of anything.

“On a lot of drugs?”

“Pain meds, yeah. You didn’t know where you were last time you woke up, you started panicking. They had to sedate you.” 

He doesn’t remember that.

“What’s the damage, then?” He asks a couple of minutes later.

“Erm… dehydration and malnutrition, broken arm, some damage to your throat – ” Aaron pauses as his eyes suddenly well up. “You had… really bad bruises on your neck when I found you. From… ”

“Yeah, he tried to strangle me. S’when I hit him.”

Aaron’s fingers come up to brush the side of Robert’s neck, his touch feather-light like he thinks Robert might shatter in front of him. Robert’s guessing there are some finger-shaped marks on his throat, but he doesn’t ask. Aaron’s hand travels up to cup his jaw, and he leans into it automatically.

“You’re okay now,” Aaron whispers, almost to himself. “You’re gonna be okay.”

“Is he alive? Police, they got him?” Robert asks, even as his eyes begin to flutter closed. He’s suddenly exhausted again.

“Yeah, they did. You’re safe.”

“Are Vic and Diane – ”

“They’ve been here; you were asleep, though. They’re looking after Seb for us.”

“Seb… ”

“Shh, he’s fine, I promise you. Just rest.”

Robert wants to protest that he’s _been_ resting, but he’s already slipping into unconsciousness once more. He thinks he feels the press of warm lips against his forehead.

****

“What’s the date?” Robert asks, picking at the tape holding the IV in place. The doctors are pumping him with fluids in an attempt to get some nutrition back into his body. His voice is still pretty hoarse, but today’s the first day he’s been able to stay awake and hold a conversation for longer than a few minutes. 

“How long’s it been?”

“It’s the 7th September,” Aaron says, batting Robert’s hand away from the tape. “You were gone for six weeks and five days. And you’ve been in here for five more days – asleep for most of them, you lazy git.”

Robert nods slowly, trying to wrap his mind around how much time he’s lost. The last time he’d been free, it was the middle of summer.

“Is – is Rebecca dead?”

Aaron looks at him sharply. “Yeah… she is. Did you…?”

“He told me. I wasn’t there but he made sure I knew, said I was next.” Robert’s mind flashes back to the blood on Lachlan’s hands, the burning kimono.

Anger clouds Aaron’s eyes, his jaw clenching hard.

“What happened? In the six weeks, I mean? How’d you find me?”

“Rob… ”

“Please, I want to know. Give me the gist, at least.”

Aaron looks down, playing with Robert’s fingers. He’s barely stopped touching him since they’ve been in the hospital. Robert’s not about to complain.

“I came home after my chicken pox cleared up and you weren’t there. I thought it was weird since you’d told me you weren’t feeling well that day.” 

Robert remembers speaking briefly to Aaron – whining really – about how ill he was feeling, how he’d was taking the day off work.

“But I got a text from you – from your phone, anyway – saying you felt better so you’d decided to go to some meetings after all. Said that it was an overnight thing, and your weekend bag and some of your clothes were missing so… I didn’t think too much of it at first.”

Christ, the little shit really had thought of everything.

“Lachlan had it. My phone.”

Aaron nods.

“I was worried when you didn’t answer my calls… but then when I came home that night after catching up with my mum and Paddy, the carbon monoxide detector was going off, we’d had a gas leak – ”

“That was him, it was Lachlan,” Robert says, causing Aaron to frown in confusion. 

“He – he messed with the boiler and the alarm, said his original plan was to kill me that way. That’s why I felt so poorly, it was carbon monoxide poisoning. But he changed his mind, said he wanted to – to make it last, make me suffer, so he took me instead. He must’ve come back to fix the alarm.”

Aaron blinks rapidly, anger returning to his face as he buried it in his hands. “God, I could kill him with my bare hands.”

“M’just glad I sent Seb to Diane’s that day. If – if I hadn’t… ” He falls silent, too sick to get the words out.

“Oi, but you did,” Aaron calms him. “He’s fine, not a scratch on him.”

“So… then what?”

“All the boiler stuff distracted me at first, but once it was sorted, I still couldn’t get hold of you, neither could Diane or Vic. I was starting to panic a bit, but then… more texts came from your phone. Saying that Rebecca had run off to Wales, that her head was really bad and you were worried for her so you’d gone after her. That you were trying to track her down.”

“Right… ”

“I told Vic, and she said that Rebecca was gone, too, she'd supposedly sent texts saying something similar. So it added up, sort of. But it didn’t feel right to me, I knew you wouldn’t take off somewhere without calling. And… I dunno, the texts said all the right things but… they didn’t sound like you.  Everyone told me to calm down, Mum, Paddy, Liv… but I couldn’t shake the feeling that you were in trouble. I tried calling the police but they didn’t take it seriously, I had to look for you myself.” 

Aaron sighs, shaking his head with a look of annoyance on his face.  Robert can only imagine the frustration he’d have felt if he’d been in Aaron’s position, had their roles been reversed.

“Then as time went by, people – _some_ people – thought that… ” He looks uncomfortable all of a sudden. “That something else was going on. That the texts _were_ from you, but they weren’t the truth.”

“What d’you mean?” Robert frowns, not catching his meaning.

“My mum and Paddy… they started saying that maybe you – you and Rebecca had run away. That you were, y’know, _together_.”

“Sorry, _what_?”

“I know,” Aaron holds his hands up. “I know, trust me. But it started spreading round the village, soon they had people thinking…”

“Nice… ”

“Not everyone, though,” Aaron’s quick to reassure him. “Just idiots like Ross and gossips who don’t know what they’re talking about. Vic and Diane didn’t believe it, neither did Jimmy and Nicola. Or Bernice, Vanessa, Pete… My gran, too, she was on my side.”

“You didn’t believe it, either, then?”

“Not for a second. I know you better than that,” Aaron insists, no hint of a lie in his face. 

“But my mum and Paddy, they were spoutin’ all kinds of rubbish, saying you’d left me. And… ” he hesitates. “And so was Liv.”

Robert blinks, mouth falling open slightly. “Liv? She really thought I…?”

“She was... pretty quick to believe my mum’s version of events, kept bringing up what happened last year and said some other stuff about you – about _us_ – that I won’t bother repeating.” The sadness and disappointment filling Aaron’s voice makes Robert’s heart clench.

“Things got pretty bad, we were arguing a lot – even more than we were during the whole drink spiking mess. So in the end, I told her if she wasn’t going to help me, maybe it’d be best if she went to stay at Sandra’s for the rest of the summer. She packed a suitcase and stormed out that same day.”

“But it’s September now… is she back, then?”

“Er, no actually… her GCSE results came back a few days ago, she’s failed the whole lot of them. Sandra’s totally freaked out about how things have gone for her this year – first the drinking, then prison, now this. She said she wants Liv to stay with her for a bit, keep an eye on her. So she’s still there, for the time being at least.”

Robert nods and swallows thickly, hurt flooding through his chest. Chas and Paddy thinking the worst of him wasn’t exactly a surprise. He's not an idiot; ever since he and Aaron had got back together, he'd been fully aware that Aaron’s parents were playing nice with him with for Aaron’s sake. They’d barely accepted him the first time around, there was no way they'd do it again. 

But Liv… he’d really thought that after all this time, the two of them had reached a point where they at least _sort-of_ got along with each other. That she finally understood how important Aaron was to him. Apparently not.

“But hey,” Aaron says firmly. “None of this is for you to worry about, alright? All you need to focus on is getting better. Yeah?”

“Okay. Tell me the rest.” 

“I was still looking everywhere for you, putting up missing posters, trying to think of anything that might explain where you’d gone. Even drove to Wales and back like an idiot. And that whole time Lachlan was being… I don’t know, weird. He was just always _there_ , askin’ me questions, wanting to know if I’d had any luck tracking you down. He kept staring at Seb, too, and bringing up all this stuff about how he knew what it was like to lose your parents. The way he was talking, the look on his face was, I dunno… _wrong_.

“I couldn’t outright accuse him of anythin', I didn’t have any proof. All I could do was keep an eye on him and keep trying to get the police to listen to me. So did Diane and Vic; we tried to make them understand that you’d never just leave Seb – and neither would Rebecca, for that matter. They eventually checked your bank account and saw you hadn’t touched your money, and when they traced both of your phones, they realised that the texts had been coming from within the village the whole time. That’s when they _finally_ started looking into it properly, doing proper searches. Then about a week ago… ”

Aaron trails off, his face turning pale all of a sudden.

“They found a body in the forest. It was – ”

“Rebecca.”

Aaron’s bottom lip trembles, voice cracking as he continues. “When they found her, I really thought… _God_ Rob, I thought you might be – ” 

Robert pushes himself up when Aaron’s face crumples and tears spill rapidly from his eyes.

“Hey, c’mere,” he whispers, pulling Aaron to sit on the bed and wrap him into the tightest hug he can manage without dislodging any wires.

“I thought I’d lost you,” Aaron chokes into his chest, hot tears splashing onto Robert’s collarbone. “Thought I might never see you again.”

“M’still here,” Robert says soothingly. “You know me, impossible to get rid of. Like a cockroach.”

Aaron hiccups a slightly hollow laugh and lays there for a few minutes, before sitting up and wiping his cheeks with his sleeve. Robert reaches up to brush his wet eyelashes with his thumb.

“I love you.” He hasn’t said the words in what feels like forever; they’re almost foreign on his tongue.

“I love you, too. I love you so much.”

Aaron’s eyes dart down, and they’re leaning in to press their mouths together. It’s the first kiss they’ve shared since this whole nightmare began, and _God_ , Robert’s missed the feeling of Aaron’s lips on his. It starts soft and gentle, but within seconds he’s groaning and carding fingers through his hair, pressing harder into Aaron and seeking out the taste of him until it’s as familiar as it had been two months ago.

Aaron eventually pulls back, lips parting from Robert’s with a gasp.

“Oi, you’re meant to be takin’ it easy,” he says breathlessly, but he’s smiling so Robert counts it as a win.

He moves back but doesn't let Aaron go far, keeping a hand on his arm.

“So… ” He gestures for him to continue.

“The police started taking everything pretty damn seriously after that – no surprises there,” Aaron scoffs. “Lachlan had to identify Rebecca’s body… I guess there must have been something suspicious about the way he acted, because suddenly the police were all over him, asking us loads of questions about him.

“Then on the day we found you, I think he must’ve realised how much shit he was in. He was acting like a lunatic, tried to drag our Belle into his car so he could run away with her.”

Robert remembers how erratic Lachlan had been on the morning of his last day in captivity, the way he'd dashed out of the room when his phone rang. That must have been just before he went for Belle.

“Is she alright?”

“Bit shaken, but she’s fine. Cain stopped him from taking her, but he got away, disappeared. I thought – _hoped_ – he might be going to wherever you were, so we went looking for you both, searched any secluded places we could think of. And we found you. Or, you found us,” Aaron says with a watery smile.

“The police showed up and grabbed him not long after, charged him as soon as his head was stitched up. He’s in custody now.”

Robert leans back into the pillows and stares at the ceiling.

“Let’s hope he stays there.”

****

Robert nearly breaks down when he sees Seb.

Victoria passes him over as soon as she enters the room, Diane close behind her.

“Hey cheeky,” he chokes out, tears welling in his eyes as he strokes a hand through his son’s soft hair. It’s grown since he last saw him, blond wisps transformed into slightly ginger curls. “You have no idea how desperate I’ve been to give you a cuddle.”

Vic loops her arms tightly around his shoulders, holding onto him as he holds onto Seb.

“I could say the same to you,” she cries. “I missed you so much.”

Diane fusses over him in her usual way, brushing back his hair and readjusting his blanket.

“Oh love,” she sighs, patting his arm and giving him a wobbly smile. “I’d hoped we could at least make it through the year without seeing you in here again.”

“At least it’s not Christmas Day this time, eh?” Robert says with a small grin.

“Never again, if I have my way,” says Aaron, looking fondly at Seb babbling happily on Robert’s chest, patting at his cheeks with tiny hands.

“Think he missed you more than the rest of us put together.”

“I was scared he might’ve forgotten me,” Robert whispers, unable to take his eyes off Seb, who shoots him a gummy smile in return.

“Don’t be silly, you’re his dad,” Diane tuts. “He’d know you anywhere.”

****

When Vic and Diane nip out for coffee, Robert and Aaron are left alone with Seb.

“They’ve been a godsend, helping me with him these last few weeks,” Aaron says after they leave. “Though on the other hand, I wanted him close most of the time, he was the only thing keepin’ me sane some days.”

“We’re all he has now,” Robert whispers as he strokes a hand along Seb’s back, soothing him as he snuffles in his sleep, chubby legs kicking out.

“I know,” Aaron murmurs quietly.

“I wish… ” Robert sighs heavily and thinks of Rebecca. 

She’d never meant anything much to him, but he’d never wanted Seb to grow up without his mother. He wouldn’t wish that on any child.

“I know,” Aaron says again. “But we’ll take care of him, won’t we?”

“Lachlan said that – that when I was gone, Seb would have no one. He’d be alone.”

“You really think I would’ve let that happen? If it came down to it?” Aaron looks almost insulted.

Robert gazes up at him and feels himself fall a little bit more in love on the spot.

“No… of course not. I knew he was just trying to mess with my head.” 

He tries to push down the memory of _what else_ Lachlan had said would happen to Seb after he was gone. He never wants to think about it again.

Mollified, Aaron comes to perch on the edge of the bed and steals a grape from the bunch Diane had brought with her.

“I know it’ll be hard, him growing up without her, but he’s got us. Two parents who love him, who’ll bring him up to be happy and safe and secure.”

Robert smiles and snags Aaron’s collar, pulling him in. Aaron comes easily, kissing him once, twice, and pressing a final one to the back of Seb’s head.

“We’re a family,” he says as he presses his forehead to Robert’s. “You know – ”

“I know.”

****

The doctors are pleased with Robert's physical progress; his injuries are healing and he’s finally starting to put a bit of weight back on. They've even started letting Aaron and Vic take him on little walks to the canteen. Slowly but surely, his body is beginning to recover. His head, on the other hand…

They give him medication to help him sleep undisturbed, but Lachlan’s still there, lurking in the back of his mind. He jumps nearly every time the door swings open and he can’t stand having the window closed, it makes the room feel too stuffy and claustrophobic.

It isn’t long before a counsellor pays his room a visit. Christopher is kind and patient with him, even when Robert doesn’t feel up to talking to anyone other than Aaron. He explains that Robert’s been through a significant trauma – _you’re not kidding_ , Robert thinks ruefully – and that it’ll take time to get past it. 

Christopher recommends a period of regular sessions once Robert is released from hospital. Robert thinks of Aaron, of Seb, of their future, and he agrees readily.

****

The day that Robert gives the police his statement is a hard one.

The doctors had sent them packing before, but they wouldn’t be put off any longer. He tells two detectives everything he can remember; how Lachlan kept him prisoner, every threat he’d made and every injury he’d caused. He tells them about the day Lachlan killed Rebecca, and repeats what Lachlan told him about killing Chrissie, Lawrence and Gerry. Tells them about how he’d managed to escape and their fight in the forest.

Aaron sits by his bed the whole time, clutching his hand until the knuckles turn white.

By the time Robert’s done, he’s utterly drained. Both detectives thank him profusely for the information he’s given them and tell him to just focus on himself now. They’ll take care of the rest.

Once they’ve left, a heavy silence fills the room.

“I should’ve believed you… ” Aaron says eventually.

“What?”

“About Lachlan… causin’ that car crash. You told me he’d done it but I didn’t listen to you, none of us did.”

“I don’t blame you, I know it sounded mad.”

“But – but if I had,” Aaron worries his lip. “Then maybe… none of this would’ve – ”

“Oi, stop it.”

“But Rob – ”

“No, look it’s… don’t think like that, okay? I didn’t _know_ , not really, it was just a feeling. It’s not like anything could’ve been proved, is it? It’s no one’s fault, Aaron, least of all yours.”

Aaron still doesn’t look happy, but the distress in his face eases slightly.

“I forgot to tell the police about my ring,” Robert says after a while.

“Hmm?”

“My ring… ” He holds up his left hand briefly.

“Oh,” Aaron nods, understanding. “I did notice it was missing… I wasn’t sure if it got lost or – ”

“He took it off me. S’when I got this,” he gestures to the cast on his left arm, voice wobbling as he looks at the ringless finger mournfully. “He said I wouldn’t need it anymore.”

Aaron reaches out to place a hand on top of Robert’s, stroking over the spot where the ring should be.

“That’s okay, we can get new ones. It doesn’t matter, Rob – ”

“It _does_ matter.”

Aaron pauses for a moment, before taking his hand off Robert’s and pulling his own ring off.

“What are you – ”

Aaron lifts Robert’s left hand and slides the ring down his finger in one smooth motion.

“There,” he says, pressing a kiss to it. “You can have mine.”

“Aaron, no, that’s your ring… ”

“What’s mine is yours, ain’t that how the saying goes?” Aaron smiles, a slight twinkle in his eye. “We’ll sort something… either we find yours or maybe we can get this one made into two, but for now… you can keep this.”

Robert whispers his thanks and thumbs the ring; it’s a little loose on his finger, but just as comforting and meaningful as the one that came before it.

****

“Doctors said I can come home tomorrow,” Robert says as soon as Aaron walks into his room.

Aaron’s face lights up instantly. “About time. Can’t wait to have you back, the house hasn’t been the same since… ”

Robert casts his mind back to the last time he’d been in the Mill, and a shadow falls over his good mood. It must show on his face, because Aaron frowns and nudges his leg.

“What’s up?”

“Nothing, just… I _hate_ that he was in our home,” Robert says with a heavy sigh. “I hate that he just waltzed in while I was right there, and I didn’t stop him.”

“It wasn’t your fault, Rob.”

“I know, I’m not saying… I just don’t want to be sitting in our living room and picture him standing over me. I know it’s mad, he’s locked up and he can’t come near us but – ”

“Hey, I get it,” Aaron lays a gentle hand on his arm. “Rob, you went through hell, no one’s expecting you to be alright straight away. But you don’t have to face this alone, we’ll get through it together, yeah?”

“Yeah… suddenly gone right off our sofa, though,” Robert jokes, but it falls flat.

****

Despite the previous day’s reservations, Robert is brimming with excitement by the time Aaron brings him home from the hospital. Armed with medication, recovery guidelines and a list of dates for followup appointments, he makes his way to the Mill’s front door with a spring in his step, taking in every brick, window and tile with newfound appreciation.

“Home sweet home,” Aaron says as he pushes the door open with a flourish.

There’s a loud squeal, and Seb is instantly wriggling out of Victoria’s lap and crawling across the rug towards them.

“Hey, little man,” Robert gingerly bends down to pick him up. “You miss me?”

Victoria pulls herself up from the floor and grabs her jacket. “Right, his highness has just been fed and changed, so you should be set for a bit.”

“You’re a star,” says Aaron, giving her a one-armed hug on her way out.

“It’s been said,” she grins and gives Robert’s waist a squeeze. “You take it easy, mister. I’ll pop by after my shift, okay?”

It isn’t until Victoria’s out the door that Robert notices a change.

Their old sofa has vanished from its spot, and an entirely different one is sitting in its place. The dark blue piece he’d picked out last year has been replaced by a grey three-seater, with a much higher back and wider arms. It’s more cosy-looking, more… _Aaron_ , really.

“What did you do?”

“You said you’d gone off it, right?” Aaron shrugs. “And honestly, once I found out that’s where you’d been lying when he – when you were taken, I couldn’t really stand the sight of it, either. I dunno, I thought if we had a new one, maybe you could sit on it and not be so reminded of… ”

Anyone who says that Aaron Dingle isn’t the thoughtful type really doesn't know him at all.

“I like it,” he whispers.

“Good, because I owe Jimmy _big time_ for going to pick it up in the van at the crack of dawn this morning for me,” Aaron replies as he puts the kettle on. “But yeah, it’s not bad is it? To be fair, I never really liked the one you picked.”

“Wha – you never said!”

“Well I’d just got out of prison, I weren’t about to complain, was I? But come on, Rob, the last one wasn’t exactly comfy, it was dead narrow and the back wasn’t even high enough to rest our heads on.”

And okay, as Robert sinks into the insanely comfortable cushions, he can perhaps admit his that his original sofa choice had been a little more about style over substance.

“So? What’s the verdict?”

“I’m never moving from this spot again.”

When Seb starts wriggling impatiently in his lap, he sets him on the floor and watches him crawl away quickly, making a beeline for his teddies.

“That’s new." 

“Hmm?” 

“I don’t remember him moving that fast.”

“Oh I know, he’s a proper speed demon at the minute. That reminds me actually… ” 

Aaron starts rummaging through a kitchen drawer and pulls out a small notepad.

“Here,” he says, flipping it open and passing it to Robert. “I kept a list of any new things he did while you were gone.”

As Robert reads the words on the first page, his face is overtaken by a fond smile. It’s written in Aaron’s messy handwriting, from Seb’s point of view.

_I can sit up in my high chair._

_My favourite food at the moment is mushy bananas._

_Sometimes I can stand up if I hold onto Auntie Victoria’s hands._

_Today I puked so hard, Daddy Aaron nearly called an exorcist._

Robert chokes a laugh at that one. 

“This is brilliant, thank you.”

“S’okay.” Aaron sets a brew down in front of him. “I wanted to make sure you were all caught up when you came home.”

When. Not _if_.

“You really didn't give up on me, eh?”

“Nope.”

****

As night falls upon the village, Robert slowly carries out his bedtime routine, going through the motions that simultaneously seem so familiar and yet surreal. A few months ago, he never would have imagined brushing his teeth and putting on moisturiser would feel like such a luxury.

Aaron watches him closely from the bed, and when Robert climbs in next to him he instantly rolls over to pull him close, tangling a hand through his hair.

“Your hair’s so long.”

“God I know, it’s a mess.”

“I dunno, kind of reminds me of when we first met,” Aaron smiles fondly, playing with the blond strands between his fingers. “But yeah, better get it cut. Wasn’t your best look, that.”

“Worked for you, didn’t it?” Robert says, raising an eyebrow at him.

Aaron huffs a laugh and they lie there in silence for a few minutes, until their breaths slow and sync.

“The bed was too big without you,” Aaron eventually whispers. “I couldn’t sleep in it. I even missed your kicking.” 

“I’ll remember that next time you moan about it,” Robert smiles against his chest.

He slides a hand along Aaron’s arm, coming to a stop on his wrist, fingers pressing into the steady beat of his pulse.

“This is gonna sound mad,” he mumbles into Aaron's chest. “But when I was… back there… I used to hear your voice sometimes. In my head, just… talking to me, helping me. I dunno, it was probably just dehydration or something, making me lose my marbles but… it was nice. Like I wasn’t alone.”

Aaron doesn’t say anything for a long moment, though there’s a telltale hitch in his breathing.

“M'glad,” he eventually says, pulling the covers higher over them.

****

The Mill has a flurry of visitors over the next few days. Robert’s not up to much conversation, spending most of his time curled up on the new sofa in one of Aaron’s hoodies, but Diane and Victoria are in and out constantly, as is Bernice. The first time she walks through the front door, she instantly walks back out again and returns with some scissors from the salon, determined to fix his hair as matter of urgency. 

Victoria also pilfers the list of instructions the doctors had given Robert on what he should be eating to get his body and weight back to where it should be. Between their medical advice and a bit of her own googling, she’s taken it upon herself to concoct the most nutritious diet he could ask for. Every time she drops off another freshly-cooked meal for them both, Aaron looks like he might actually kiss her.

When Robert asks Victoria if she’s sure she has time for all this extra cooking, she narrows her eyes and tells him she’s not exactly feeling obliged to make much effort working for _Chas bloody Dingle_ at the moment. He can’t help but grin at the haughty expression on her face when she adds that she is, in fact, currently seeking employment elsewhere.

Nicola and Jimmy come knocking on Robert’s second morning back.

“Mate!” Jimmy launches himself at Robert, hugging him so hard it knocks the wind out of him. “We’re so chuffed to have you back, aren’t we Nicola?”

“Alright Jimmy, get off him,” Nicola tuts, before giving Robert a fond look. It’s slightly alarming, coming from her. “He's not wrong, though.”

When Faith drops by, she practically pushes Aaron out of her way when he answers the door and swoops in to plant a wet kiss on Robert’s cheek. 

“Oh sweetheart,” she coos as she rubs off the lipstick stains she’s left on his face. “Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes? We've missed having your handsome face around here!”

Robert notices how warm Aaron seems towards his gran, hugging her tightly and offering her a brew while he takes her coat. Of course, Aaron had adored Faith since she turned up in the village, but it usually came with a certain degree of exasperation. _She’s best in small doses_ , he’d once told Robert.

But now, the pair seem to have a newfound closeness that wasn’t there the last time Robert had seen her. He supposes it’s a result of Faith being the only family member Aaron had been able to turn to over the last few weeks, the only one who’d believed his fears without question from the beginning.

It’s nice to watch them together, he’s glad Aaron had her while he was gone. He just wishes Aaron had been able to rely on the rest of his family, too…

****

When Robert starts feeling stronger, Diane insists on taking them all out for their tea at the Woolpack. He’s barely been out for anything other than a brief walk, so he enters the pub with some caution, Aaron close behind him with a reassuring hand on the small of his back. But it isn’t too busy, and while a few patrons stare at him briefly or call out something along the lines of _glad you're not dead_ , for the most part it’s like he never left.

“Now then, pet, get anything you want, it’s my treat,” Diane says as they settle around a table by the window. “We still need to fatten you up.”

“He’s not a farm animal, Diane,” Vic rolls her eyes and reaches over the tickle Seb under the chin. “It’s not like we’re not about to eat him for Sunday dinner.”

“Well of course not, but there’s no harm in… ”

Robert tunes them out, distracted by the sight of Chas and Paddy stood behind the bar. It's clear that they’re both trying very hard to pretend they haven’t seen him.

Sod that.

“Drinks, anyone?” He asks as he stands, already fishing his wallet out of his pocket.

“I can get them, Robert,” Vic says quickly, eyes darting to the bar.

“It’s fine, I think I can manage.”

He doesn’t wait for a response before marching over to the bar with his head held high, coming to a halt in front of a slightly taken-aback Chas.

“Pint, two white wines and an orange juice, please?”

Chas freezes and opens her mouth like she wants to say something, before closing it again and busying herself pouring the drinks. Paddy shifts awkwardly behind her, face as red as a tomato.

“On the house,” she mutters as she places their drinks in front of him, barely glancing up. Robert doesn’t think he’s ever seen her look so uncomfortable.

“That’s supposed to make up for you telling everyone I’d betrayed Aaron and abandoned my own son, is it?” Robert snipes, loud enough for everyone can hear him.  He tosses some cash on the bar. “Don’t bother.”

“Look,” Chas says, still not looking him in the eye. “We got it wrong, alright?”

“Understatement,” Aaron scoffs, suddenly pressed to Robert’s side.

“Aaron, love, I was just looking out for you.”

Robert doesn’t fight the urge to roll his eyes. He’d heard that one before.

“Come on,” Paddy finally pipes up. “You must realise it looked a bit – a bit – ”

“A bit what? Bit suspicious? A bit like something might be wrong? You got that much right, at least.”

“Well,” Chas says with an air of finality, like she’s keen to bring the conversation to a swift end. “I’ve apologised now, so can we just – ”

“Actually, you haven’t,” Robert cuts her off. 

Chas blinks at him uncomprehendingly.

“I haven't heard the words ‘I’m sorry’ come out of your mouth yet.”

There’s a very long silence. Diane and Victoria look on warily, and the other customers don’t even pretend to hide how avidly they’re watching the scene. Robert would be lying if he said the nastier part of him wasn't enjoying it.

“I’m sorry,” she forces the words out through gritted teeth. “I was just worried about Aaron.”

“Yeah, speaking of Aaron,” Robert adds. “I’d say you both owe him an apology, too.”

“What for?!” Paddy splutters incredulously.

“Oh, I dunno, maybe for ignoring him when he tried to tell you something was wrong? For not giving him help or support when he asked you for it?”

“Rob.” Aaron wraps a hand around his elbow. “It’s fine, that doesn’t matter.”

“It bloody well does.”

“I was doing what I thought was best at the time,” Chas spits out, arms folded over her chest. “It’s not like you didn’t have form, I won’t be sorry for trying to protect my son from what I thought was happening.”

“Then you and me are going to have a problem.”

“Okay, I think that’s enough for now, come on,” Aaron picks up the drinks and ushers Robert towards their table. 

Robert goes easily; he's said his piece. Before he sits down, Aaron turns back to the bar, disappointment etched on his face.

“Mum, just keep your distance for a bit, yeah? I don’t have much to say to either of you right now, anyway.”

“Been back five minutes and you’re already makin’ scenes in the Woolie,” Victoria mutters into her wine. “Good to know some things haven’t changed, eh?”

****

That night, Robert pulls Aaron close when he comes out of the en-suite, hands wandering as he nuzzles at his neck.

“You smell good.”

Aaron hums in response for a moment, before pulling away.

“No, where’re you goin’?” Robert reaches for him back with a whine.

“The doctors said you can’t push yourself. You need to take it easy.”

“I need _you_.” He kisses Aaron softly, palming him through his jeans. “Aaron, come on, this is the best I’ve felt since I got out of the hospital.”

Aaron’s _so_ close to giving in, he can tell, body practically vibrating with want against his own.

“Look,” Robert reasons. “We don’t have to do anything… _ambitious_.” 

He waggles his eyebrows, making Aaron laugh lightly.

“But please, just… ” He kisses him again, trying to pour just how much he wants this into it.

“Okay,” Aaron sighs into his mouth. “But we go slow and if it’s too much, you _tell_ me, yeah?”

“Yeah, course.”

Aaron kisses Robert back properly this time, his hands moving to grip Robert’s waist and pull him in, already full of want and grinding against him. Before he knows it, they’re lying on the bed, Aaron's peeling their clothes off and Robert’s keening under him.

“Missed this,” Robert sighs, head tipping back on the pillows as Aaron’s mouth starts travelling down his torso. “Missed this – _you_ – so much, you have no idea… ”

Aaron lets out a quiet huff from where he’s scraping teeth over Robert’s hipbone. “Think I do, actually.”

He raises his head to look Robert, his smile a little wobbly. “I’ve been _lost_ without you, you idiot.”

Robert releases a shaky breath, before reaching for Aaron with urgent hands and pulling him in for another bruising kiss. They linger there for a while, Aaron curling his tongue around Robert’s, bracketing his body with his arms and rocking into him it’s the only thing he wants to do in the world.

Part of Robert wants to rush this, wants to touch everywhere all at once, make up for the time he missed. The rest of him is deliriously happy with the slow pace Aaron sets; it gives him time to revel in every touch, every kiss, every breathy sigh coming from above him. 

The weight of Aaron on top of him drives him crazy, his touch-starved skin feeling like it’s on fire as he arches up to meet each roll of Aaron’s hips, cock so hard it’s almost painful.

“Want you inside me,” he eventually groans against Aaron’s damp shoulder.

Aaron’s hips stutter. “You sure?”

“God yes. Please, Aaron… ” He’s vaguely aware of how needy he sounds, but he’d thought he might never have this again. After what they’ve been through, what they almost lost… he thinks he's allowed to be a little needy.

Thankfully, Aaron doesn’t argue with him, taking his time to open Robert up with careful, tender fingers whilst pressing open-mouthed kisses to his neck. By the time he slowly pushes inside, they’re both panting heavily and grasping at each other with desperate hands.

“Okay?” Aaron whispers when he bottoms out, arms trembling with the effort of holding himself still.

Robert nods quickly, pulling Aaron’s head down to press his forehead against his own. “Jus' give me a sec.”

It’s been a while, so he’s a little tight, but the feeling of Aaron inside him is as amazing and familiar as it’s always been.

“ _Move_ ,” Robert eventually chokes out, giving Aaron a quick squeeze with his raised knees. 

From there, Robert’s lost in blissful haze, the steady pace Aaron sets making him gasp and sigh underneath him. He wants more, though, wants him so badly it hurts.

“M’not gonna break,” he grunts as he tilts his hips, chasing after the pleasure.

Aaron shudders when Robert threads a hand in his dark, sweaty hair, tugging lightly. 

“I know,” he pants against Robert’s cheek.

“So… ” He raises his eyebrow, wriggling his hips impatiently. 

Aaron looks down at him with a slightly exasperated smile, before picking up the pace, hooking Robert’s leg higher to get a better angle and thrusting faster, _harder_. Their ragged breaths soon turn to sharp groans, and Robert knows he’s not going to last much longer, familiar tight heat coiling in his stomach and his fingernails digging little crescent moons into Aaron's back.

“Fuck, I– _ah_ – I love you.” 

“Love you, too,” Aaron gasps, taking Robert’s cock in his hand. “Need you, missed you, Rob, _God_.” His voice cracks as his movements turn erratic, losing their rhythm.

“Missed you too, I missed you so much, Aaron I’m gonna – _Aaron_ – ” 

Robert’s near-mindless rambling is cut off by a deliciously deep thrust from Aaron, and before he has a chance to catch his breath, his orgasm is ripping through him, so intense he thinks he might actually break after all.

Aaron is quick to follow him a few seconds later, slamming into Robert and messily pressing his lips to his as he comes with a long shudder.

Afterwards, when they’ve shakily pulled themselves apart and Robert’s let Aaron clean them both up, they migrate under the covers, cooling bodies entangled as the pounding of their hearts eases.

“Alright?” Aaron asks quietly, fingers tracing over the impressive hickey he left on Robert’s neck.

“Eh, not quite as good as I remember – ow!”

He laughs when Aaron smacks his chest, hands reaching out to tickle him in retaliation.

They've been through hell, and things aren’t anywhere near back to normal, not yet… but they’ve still got this. Tucked up in here, just the two of them, the worries of the outside world can’t touch them. It feels like sanctuary, and Robert’s more grateful for it than he can put into words.

****

Rebecca’s funeral is – unsurprisingly – a sombre affair. It’s a pretty small service, only attended by some residents of the village and a few friends from Rebecca’s old life before she came to Emmerdale. They turn up in expensive-looking black dresses and sit together at the back of the church, occasionally dabbing at their impeccably made-up faces. None of them stick around for the wake.

For his part, Robert sits through the service in dry-eyed silence, staring at the coffin as Harriet talks.

_Lachlan meant for it to be me. It was supposed to be me._

A similar thought is probably running through Aaron’s mind, if the pained look on his face and the way he clings to Robert a little too tightly is anything to go by.

After Rebecca’s body is laid to rest, they walk out of the graveyard slowly, Robert keeping an arm around Victoria’s shoulders as she lets out the occasional sob. She’d been the only villager to see Rebecca as a friend, so she’s taking it harder than the rest.

As they step onto Main Street, Ross Barton catches up with them and grabs Robert’s arm.

“Did you – ” he coughs gruffly. “Did you see her before – before she – ”

Robert can already feel Aaron tensing, ready to tell Ross to back off, and Pete's trying to pull him away, too, but Robert answers him.

“No, I never saw her, he kept us in different places. I’m sorry.” 

Ross stares at him with an unreadable expression on his face. Robert idly thinks about trying to offer some words of comfort, but he stalks away in the opposite direction before he has a chance.

A few days later, Pete tells them that’s Ross has taken off to Liverpool, apparently for a fresh start. Robert can’t say he’ll miss him.

****

“You’re kidding me,” Aaron says flatly to detectives in their living room, the same two who’d interviewed him at the hospital. “ _Not_ guilty? He can’t be serious!”

Robert’s heart thuds painfully in his chest. Lachlan pleading not guilty means a trial. It means he’ll have to spend days – possibly weeks – standing up and telling everyone exactly what happened to him. Reliving every excruciating moment to try and convince a jury Lachlan deserves to be behind bars.

“His lawyer originally tried pleading insanity.” The younger detective sounds apologetic. “But the courts weren’t having it, so he’s going with a not guilty plea.”

“But – but there’s so much evidence,” Aaron insists, warm hand squeezing Robert’s thigh. “Does he honestly think there’s even a chance he’ll get away with this?”

Neither of the detectives can provide much more information, and Robert doubts there’s anything they could say to make him feel better anyway. Aaron sees them out and quickly returns to pull him into a hug, arms tight around his shoulders. Robert closes his eyes and tries to breathe.

****

He’s diagnosed with PTSD. It’s no surprise, really, it’s not as if there’s a shortage of things to bring up in his counselling sessions.

Like the nightmares, for a start. If it’s not Lachlan coming for him with murderous glint in his eye, it’s Robert being left alone to rot, no one ever finding him no matter how loudly he screams. Some nights, he wakes up yelling and thrashing around in bed – nearly giving Aaron a black eye one time. It takes Aaron ages to calm him enough to close his eyes again – if he does at all.

He still hates being in a room with the windows closed. It doesn’t matter much right now, the mild autumn weather bringing a pleasant breeze, but it’ll only be a few weeks before that changes. If he doesn’t sort himself out, they’ll soon be living in an ice box.

He can't stand the silence that comes with being alone for too long. Thankfully, Seb unknowingly provides an easy fix to this; if he’s awake, that automatically means there’s usually a lot of noise and activity in the room. He’s the perfect distraction, really.

But when Seb’s asleep, and Aaron’s popped to the scrapyard… Robert can’t go for more than a few minutes without turning the tv or radio on, volume turned up.

Then there’s constant showering. He’s taken to washing at least twice a day – sometimes three or four times. The desire to be clean consumed his thoughts for so long, it’s become hard to stop now that he has the freedom to do so. Their water bill is going to be astronomical.

Aaron doesn’t say anything about it, just secures a plastic bag over Robert’s left arm to stop his cast from getting wet. But if Robert stands under the water for too long, skin scrubbed until it's raw, Aaron will shuck off his clothes and climb in with him. Each time, he gently eases the washcloth out of Robert’s pruney fingers and turns off the tap, before wrapping him up in a fresh towel.

“All clean,” is the only thing he says, giving Robert a kiss on the cheek and drying them off.

In short, Robert has good days and bad days. Easy moments and hard ones.

One morning, he pops into the shop to get milk for their morning coffee, and he sees David stocking the fridge with drinks. When his eyes fall to a plastic water bottle in David’s hand, he freezes instantly. Suddenly he’s not in the shop, he’s back in that room, trapped the middle of nowhere, and Lachlan’s holding out a fresh bottle with a wide smirk on his face.

“Robert?” David’s asking, his tone wary and confused. “You alright there, mate?”

He takes a tentative step towards Robert, still holding the bottle, and Robert just… _bolts_.

He dashes out of the shop and away from Main Street, feet pounding through the village until he finds himself on the footbridge. He skids to a halt and leans over the side, gasping heavily and letting the light trickle of the stream slowly calm the pounding in his ears.

_You’re not there. You’re home, you’re free._

He doesn’t know how long he stands there, staring into the water, before he hears the sound of familiar footsteps come up behind him.

“David rang me,” Aaron says softly. Seb’s in his arms, still in his nighttime onesie with a coat thrown over it. “He was worried about you, said you ran out of the shop like you’d seen a ghost.”

Robert wordlessly reaches to take Seb and pull him in for a cuddle. He doesn't speak for a long time.

“I didn’t get the milk," he eventually mumbles into Seb’s hair.

“That’s okay.”

“I had a panic attack over a bottle of water.” A flush of embarrassment creeps into his cheeks.

Aaron steps closer and wraps an arm around his waist.

“That’s okay, too.”

****

“No, Liv, I’ve already told you I can’t go anywhere.”

Robert hears Aaron’s voice as he comes down from putting Seb down in his crib. As he hovers on the spiral staircase, he can see Aaron pacing in front of the fireplace with the phone to his ear.

“Well, I’m sorry you feel that way but – ”

His shoulders are tense, mouth twisted in frustration.

“Robert needs me, he’s been through… no, yeah I know… I get that, but he has to be my priority right now. If you think that’s me being selfish then I dunno what to tell you.”

Robert sinks down on the steps, stomach churning uncomfortably. It’s not the first time he’s overheard a conversation like this between the siblings over the last few weeks.

“Look, just use this time to focus on you, yeah? Try and get back on track with your studies, stay out of trouble and – right. Well, I guess I’ll talk to you later then. Bye.”

He throws the phone down with a sigh, running a hand through his hair.

“What’s up with Liv?” Robert asks quietly.

“She wants me to come to Ireland, says her mum’s driving her mad.” 

“I don’t mind, if you need to be with – ”

“I need to be here,” Aaron cuts him off, tone leaving no room for argument. “She’s old enough to understand that.” 

It’s extremely rare for Aaron to deny Liv anything, especially when she’s pissed off with him. It's strange to see.

“She could come back, even if it’s just for a visit? If she wants to see you.”

Aaron hesitates, worrying his lip. 

“I know, I’ve suggested that a couple of times, but she always says she doesn’t want to. She won’t say it, but I think she’s maybe… too embarrassed? About getting it so wrong. I don’t think she knows how to face you after everything.”

Part of Robert wants to feel bad about that, and maybe try reaching out to Liv. Let her know it’s okay, he doesn’t hold it against her. That they can come back from this.

But he’s not sure it would be the truth.

Besides, it’s hard enough dealing with the awkward interactions with some of the villagers – the ones who’d clearly thought the worst of him – whenever he steps outside. Brenda can barely bring herself to look at him when sets foot in the cafe. Every time he passes Chas or Paddy in the street, they either duck their heads down and hurry away, or they stare uncomfortably, clearly lost on what to say or how to act.

It’s exhausting, and frankly, Robert doesn’t think he has the energy to put up with it in his own home, too. So he lets the subject drop.

****

Apparently, Lachlan has a change of heart.

He’s agreed to confess, to plead guilty to all the charges (including a murder Robert didn’t even know about – Gerry’s supposed-but-not-actual uncle), on the condition that he can see Belle.

“And… are you gonna do it?” Robert asks as Aaron passes her a cup of tea

“Obviously I don’t want to,” she says, settling into their sofa next to him. “But if it’ll help bring justice for everything he’s done… how can I not? For Gerry and Rebecca and the others, for what he did to you, what he tried to do to me. I have to do it.”

And she does. The Dingles aren’t best pleased about it – of course they had to hold a bloody family meeting over the matter – but she’s already made up her mind. Robert doesn’t know why they treat her like such a delicate flower – he thinks Belle might just be the strongest Dingle of them all. After Aaron, of course.

Lachlan gets his meeting with her, the courts get their guilty plea and a sentencing date sorted, and Robert gets something that feels like the beginnings of peace.

****

As October gives way to November, the village painted with beautiful shades of orange and red, they have a good couple of weeks. 

On Halloween, they dress Seb up in a little vampire costume and parade him around the village with the other kids – mainly as an excuse to scoff as many sweets as they can get their hands on – before tucking him up in bed and inviting Vic over for a night of pizza and bad horror films. Robert can’t remember the last time he had so much fun, mindless laughter coming easily.

Just a few days later, they join the rest of the villagers to watch the Bonfire Night fireworks display that Sam and Bob have taken charge of. It’s the first time since coming home that Robert’s really mingled with everyone properly, and as he chats with Jai and Jimmy while they wait for the show to start, sipping on the warm spiced cider that Lydia had pushed into his hands, he’s struck by how _normal_ it feels. Aaron catches his eye from where he’s stood with Cain and Isaac.

“Okay?” He mouths across the crowd, bouncing Seb in his arms and smiling warmly when Robert nods back.

They migrate towards each other as the fireworks go off, Robert putting gloved hands over Seb’s ears to avoid any noise-related meltdowns. But Seb doesn’t actually seem bothered by the loud bangs and pops, too transfixed by the bright colours lighting up the sky.

“You speak to your mum?” Robert asks quietly. He’d seen them chatting briefly, Chas having sidled up to Aaron with a hopeful expression on her face.

“Yep,” is all Aaron says in reply, mouth pressed into a thin line. 

Things between them are still frosty, to say the least. Robert lets Aaron get on with it, doesn’t push either way.

Before he can say anything else, Aaron laughs when Seb reaches up towards the sky, trying to touch the shower of pink lines that fall above them. “He’ll be old enough for sparklers next year.”

Speaking of getting older…

Seb’s first birthday is completely mental. They might have gone a _tad_ overboard, considering he won’t even remember it, but hey, your kid only turns one once. As they fill the Mill with far too many streamers and balloons, Aaron asks Robert if he’s sure he’s up for throwing a proper party. Honestly, he's glad for the distraction from Lachlan's upcoming sentencing, court date looming ever-closer.

What seems like half the village crams into their living room, all cooing and fussing over the birthday boy as they toss a gift on the small mountain that’s forming next to the fireplace. Seb looks at them all like they’ve lost their minds, but he demolishes the cake that Victoria made for him and shrieks with delight each time yet another cuddly toy is presented to him, so Robert counts the party as a success.

After the guests leave and Seb goes down for a much-needed nap, they collapse on the sofa, staring helplessly at the disastrous state of their home.

“One down, seventeen to go.” 

Aaron yawns, scrubbing his hands over bleary eyes. “God help us.”

“I talked to Jimmy and Nicola earlier, about coming back to work soon.”

Aaron lifts his hands to look at him, eyebrows raised.

“Yeah? There’s no rush.”

“I know, but I think it’s time, even if it’s only a few days a week. If I can get through something as mad as today, I can get through a few hours doing paperwork in the portacabin.”

“If you’re sure, then I think you should go for it. And it’ll be nice to look at you instead of Jimmy scratchin’ his arse all day.”

Robert laughs and goes to pull him in for a kiss, but is interrupted by the blaring alarm on his phone. It’s his medication reminder.

“I’ll get ‘em,” Aaron says, pulling himself up with a groan. 

As he heads up the stairs, Robert moves to the kitchen to make them both a well-earned brew. While he waits for the kettle to boil, he scrolls through his phone, flicking through the dozens of photos he’d taken that day and chuckling at the mess of icing in Seb’s hair.

He almost didn’t get to have this. Had things gone even slightly differently, he might not have been around for any of Seb’s birthdays at all, let alone the first one. 

But as he pulls the mugs and teabags out, something warm settles in his chest as a realisation hits him, clear and certain.

_You’re still here._

He’s not gone. He’ll be here for Seb’s next birthday, and the next, and there’s nothing Lachlan can do to take that from him.

He’s going nowhere.

****

“You don’t have to do this, y’know,” Aaron says as he watches Robert fiddle with his tie in the mirror.

“Yep, I heard you the last four times you said it,” he says shortly, trying not to let his irritation show.

He mustn’t do a very good job of it, because Aaron’s face falls, and Robert’s dropping the tie and reaching for him guiltily.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to snap.” He presses an apologetic kiss on the side of Aaron’s head.

“S’okay, I’ll let you off. As long as you’re sure, then… you know I’m with you.”

They drop Seb off at Cain and Moira’s before heading to the courthouse with Victoria and Diane. When they arrive, the police escort them in through the back to avoid any media hanging around outside, and just a few minutes later they’re waiting for the sentencing of Lachlan White to begin.

Belle sits on the row behind them, flanked by Lydia and Zak. As Lachlan is escorted into the dock with his hands cuffed, Robert’s blood runs cold. He stares at the back of his head with wide eyes and tries to quell the shaking in his hands, praying he doesn’t turn around. He has no desire to see the look on his face.

Lachlan stands stock-still as the judge reads out the charges, unflinching in the face of his substantial list of crimes. 

Five counts of murder.

Two counts of kidnapping.

One count of GBH.

One count of attempted murder.

As the list goes on, Aaron’s hand tightens in Robert’s, and Victoria leans slightly across him like she’s trying to shield him. The judge concludes reading out the charges and proceeds to drone on about the severity of Lachlan’s crimes for what seems like an eternity. 

_Just say it, I don’t care anymore, just get it over with_ , Robert thinks desperately, holding his breath. And then, finally, the sentence is announced.

It’s life. Several times over, as a matter of fact. Lachlan White is never seeing the light of day again. He’ll never hurt anyone again.

Robert lets his head drop into his hands, pressing his palms to wet eyes. He can feel Aaron rubbing his back and hear everyone around him breathe victorious sighs of relief, Lydia shushing Belle as she starts to cry softly. 

As Lachlan’s about to be led away, he finally turns and stares up at them. At first, he only has eyes for Belle, gazing at her with an agonised expression. Then his eyes drift to Robert and the sorrow drops from his face instantly, replaced with a deadly glare.

“Still breathing, then?” he calls out, tone vicious and hateful.

Aaron’s on his feet and leaning over the bar before Robert can stop him.

“Still a twisted little psycho, then? I hope you fucking _rot_ in there, you sick – ” 

“Aaron,” Robert stands and silences him with a touch of his hand. “Don’t bother, he’s not worth it.” 

He stares down at Lachlan, who’s still looking at them with a venom that Robert remembers all too well. 

“He’s nothing.”

Lachlan turns almost purple with rage, but before he can hurl back another insult, the guards strong-arm him out of sight. And just like that, he’s gone.

Victoria and Diane pull Robert into a hug, tucking themselves under an arm each as they make their way out of the courtroom.

“We can finally put this sorry mess behind us,” Diane cries with delight, wiping her eyes with a handkerchief. “I don’t know about the rest of you, but I fancy some celebratory champagne.”

Well, Robert’s never one to turn down some free bubbly. 

As Diane and Vic go on ahead, Aaron sidles up next to him and pulls him in for a hug.

“She’s right, you know,” he says, swaying them on the spot. “It’s over. You won.” 

“Couldn’t have got through it without you, though,” Robert’s words are muffled as he tucks his face into Aaron’s neck. “Not any of it. You’ve been amazing.”

“Soft lad.”

“Come on, you two!” Vic calls impatiently. 

“Better not keep ‘em waiting.” 

Aaron grins and leads him down the marble staircase towards the door.

He’s not wrong. It’s over.

****

On a cold December morning, Robert wakes to the feel of kisses being peppered across his face.  It’s a nice way to wake up, and is becoming more common these days. The nightmares are starting to fade, dwindling down to one or two a week. He’s getting there.

“Mmm, mornin’,” he mumbles.

“You gonna wake up anytime soon?” Aaron’s voice comes from above him. 

Robert can feel the weight of Aaron as his legs straddle his hips, his hands travelling up his chest.

“Depends, you gonna give me a reason to?”

He laughs when Aaron flicks his ear, and opens his eyes to see that he’s already dressed in jeans and a jumper, hair damp and curling over his forehead in the pale morning light.

“S’early… why’re you dressed already?”

“Had to take Seb to Vic’s, she’s lookin’ after him for a bit.”

Robert scrubs the last vestiges sleep from his eyes, frowning. “What, why?”

“’Cause we’re going for a drive.”

“Why?”

“’Cause I wanna take you out,” Aaron says exasperatedly. “If that’s alright with you?”

Robert showers and dresses quickly, while Aaron fills a flask with a hot drink from Robert’s overpriced coffee press, and they set off. The roads are quiet, and Robert doesn’t pay too much attention to the route they’re taking until Aaron eventually pulls into a lay-by off a deserted country lane.

“We’re here,” he says, turning off the engine and opening his door.

“Here being… ” Robert quickly glances around, taking in the somewhat familiar surroundings until he realises –  “Our lay-by… ”

“Yep. Glad you remember, otherwise this would’ve been a bit embarrassing,” Aaron says as he climbs out of the car. 

Robert’s quick to follow him.  “Pff, I’m hardly about to forget the place where we had our first kiss, am I?”

“Woah, _we_?” Aaron raises an eyebrow as he walks round to the front of the car and perches on the bonnet. “ _No_ , you made some mad lunge at me, I didn’t even know what’d hit me.”

“Yeah, well I don’t remember you pushing me off,” Robert fires back as he sits next to Aaron, tucking his hands in his pockets for warmth.

“That’s ’cause you ran away!”

“Yeah, because I was so freaked out.”

Aaron throws his head back and lets out a laugh, eyes dancing with amusement. “Thanks.”

Robert swallows, remembering the combination of sheer terror and exhilaration he'd felt in that moment. 

“You were all I wanted. All I could think about. I was just… petrified of what it meant.”

Aaron’s smile softens and he reaches out to give Robert’s thigh a squeeze. “I know.”

“Everything changed for me after that.”

“Me too. S’why I wanted to come back, y’know… four years to the day n’everything.”

Robert blinks. “It was today?”

“Yeah, the 4th… Wow, forgetting our anniversary, I see.”

“Sorry, I’ll remember the next ones,” Robert winces. “To be fair, we have a few to keep track of.”

Aaron just hums and takes a sip of coffee.

“Can’t believe it’s only been four years… it feels like a lifetime ago ” Robert muses quietly.

“Probably because we’ve crammed so much in.”

And God, isn’t that the truth? Robert starts to chuckle, until he realises that Aaron seems distracted now, shifting on the bonnet with a faraway look on his face.

“You okay?”

“Yeah, course.”

“Only you look a bit… ” Robert trails off, shrugging.

Aaron blows out a long breath, a foggy puff of air flying from his mouth.

“I just – when I realised the date was coming up, I wanted to bring you here because… ” 

He puts down the flask and reaches into his pocket to pull out a small velvet box.

“D’you remember what you said to me in the hospital after our crash,” he says quietly, carefully turning the box over in his hands. “When you asked me to marry you?”

Robert remains silent, too preoccupied with staring at the box in Aaron’s grip, so he continues.

“You said you’d almost lost me twice and – ”

“ – I couldn’t do it again.” He does remember, he remembers that day all too well.

“Guess I can actually say I know how you felt now.”

“Aaron – ”

“No, just… let me get this out. This summer… thinking I might’ve lost you when I’d only just got you back again… I’ve never been so scared in my life. _Way_ more scared than I was when we were trapped in that car.”

Robert wordlessly leans into Aaron so their bodies are pressed together, shoulder to thigh.

“But I got you back,” Aaron smiles at him, the beginnings of tears making his eyes shine brightly in the cold air. “I got you back and I’m not lettin’ you go again, not ever.”

“I’m not planning on going anywhere, believe me.”

“You’d better not. Because I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I wanna be your husband and raise Seb with you, maybe some more kids, too. Finally become that boring old married couple we talked about.”

“Don’t think we’d ever be called boring,” Robert whispers, grinning when Aaron shakes his head at him.

“I’m trying to be romantic, you twat, stop puttin’ me off.”

“Sorry, carry on.” 

Aaron rolls his eyes, before carefully popping the box open to reveal two rings nestled inside. They look remarkably similar to the old ones, maybe slightly thinner. 

“I got my ring melted down, so there’s a bit of it in each of these ones. Something old and something new, eh?” 

Robert had returned his borrowed ring to Aaron about a month ago, too afraid that he’d lose it since it was too big for his finger. But Aaron had refused to put it back on, not if Robert didn’t have his own, so they’d tucked it away in the bedside table drawer for the time being. 

Honestly, between starting work again, getting through the sentencing, and trying to regain some semblance of normalcy, Robert hadn’t had much of a chance to think of getting new ones sorted. But Aaron clearly had.

“You’re the love of my life, Robert. So I wanted to ask… ” He smiles and holds the box up to Robert, hopeful expression on his face.  “Will you marry me? Properly this time?”

And Robert’s eyes are filling with tears now, too, Aaron’s face becoming blurry in front of him.

“Yeah… yeah, of _course_ I will.”

He pulls Aaron in for a kiss, though they’re both smiling so hard it’s more just a press of their mouths together. Aaron pulls away to pluck one of the rings out.

“Gimme your hand, then,” he grins, sliding the ring on Robert’s finger.

Robert does the same for Aaron, giddy elation swooping through his entire body.

“Gonna make you Mr Sugden again.” 

Aaron pulls a face. “How about Dingle-Sugden?”

“Sugden-Dingle?”

“We’ll figure somethin’ out.”

“Whatever we land on,” Robert says, gazing down at their matching rings. “We should get Seb’s name changed, too.”

“Yeah?”

“We’re a family, aren’t we? Should probably make it official.” 

In all honesty, it’s all Robert can do to stop himself from suggesting they drive down to the registry office there and then. Cross the i’s and dot the t’s, make sure the world knows that Aaron… the two of them and Seb… this is it for him. And he won’t take it for granted, not ever.

Judging by the look on Aaron’s face, he’s not the only one.

“Official sounds good to me,” he says, squeezing Robert’s hand. “Think we deserve it, a happy ending.”

“Yeah… happy ending.”

**Author's Note:**

> Final note: in this universe, Robron Wedding 2.0 is held on the 25th April 2019. Meaning there’s no big night out for the villagers, Victoria never meets Lee Posner (she’s busy knocking back free champagne – groom’s best person privileges – and dancing badly with Robert at the reception) and Robert never goes to prison. 
> 
> *jazz hands* Ta-daaaaa.


End file.
